Why I Chose to Work in Food Service

Of all the jobs I could have taken in my time at college, why did I choose something like food service? I didn't have any prior experience before applying for BuDS (Brown University Dining Services). And I can't say the thought of working with food struck me as particularly exciting when I first thought of it either.

This question has definitely been on my mind for this first week of work. This would seem to suggest that I lacked a definitive reason for choosing BuDS before I started. On the contrary, I lacked substance in my earlier thoughts, and it is only now, after working 5 shifts that I have come to actualize what was initially but a romantic notion.

It's a bit of a silly statement isn't it? Working in food service is... romantic? I admit my interpretation of the term is a bit liberal here. And no, I don't mean I'm in love with food (those who know me could attest that I actually eat very little.)

What I mean is that there's something simple and gratifying about serving one's fellow human beings in such a direct manner.

Our world is full of invisible and abstract metrics. One gains "knowledge" in college, but although the asset is undoubtedly useful, it's immediate benefits are not apparent, instead relegated to the uncertain future. For humanities majors, I imagine this is especially true (I say this with the deepest respect and reverence for the humanities, which continues to teach me in ways I rarely expect.)

This list of abstractions goes on and on. From the value of "networking" to the merits of learning increasingly arcane calculus and linear algebra. With the advent of information technology, our lives are trapped within abstractions more than ever before, and though a vastly more open world can lead to new discoveries, it can also lead to a profound sense of aimlessness. While I've always been cynical when it comes to statistics on mood, the studies that claim that our generation is among the most anxious and depressed do not surprise me.

What does this have to do with working for BuDS? I am a part of this generation, and I would say that my mind is also a pretty active thing. It's easy to get bogged down by complex thoughts, especially when doing coursework or writing essays. But when I'm chopping a salad, making a pizza, or flipping a burger, my mind has only one thought.

"Make the food."

There is a kind of pleasure to be taken from such a simple, clear thought. Food Service jobs require immediate attention. The task is right in front of you, and you must finish it as best you can. And when you're done with that task, it is really done, and you move onto the next one.

You can't say that about a lot of things today.

I first discovered the power of simple, efficient work when I began washing dishes for fun in high school. Between clubs, college apps, and tests, life often felt overwhelmingly complex. But when one washes dishes, the work is right in front of you, and the progress is immediate. You can see the sink emptying and the clean pile rising. That's powerful stuff.

With all the big ideas and dreams floating around here, Brown can seem like a pretty lofty place. But at the end of the day, everyone needs to eat. And there's really something beautiful about that unity isn't there?

Update: I'm still writing!

Hello everyone,

It's been awhile since the last post. Up to now I've been writing steadily at around a post every 3 days. Unfortunately, college has been pretty busy as it gets into full swing. I'll definitely still be updating One Iris, but posts may become a bit more sporadic. Thanks for sticking with me!

Sincerely,
Chris

"Don't Send Your Kid to the Ivy League" (Deresiewicz)

Rather than doing homework this past Monday night, I found myself packing into the McCormack theater. Though I had arrived five minutes early, both the floor and the upper balcony were packed with a mix of students and what appeared to be faculty. We were all here for a talk by William Deresiewicz.

Deresiewicz is known for writing an article titled "Don't Send Your Kid to the Ivy League", which was actually an excerpt from his book, "Excellent Sheep: The Miseducation of the American Elite and the Way to a Meaningful Life." I had only skimmed the article when it first popped up on my RSS feed, but I was interested in hearing what he had to say.

His talk focused more on the value of a liberal arts education, rather than his prior criticisms of the elite institutions. If you would like to know more about the talk, here is the Herald's summary of it.

While the talk itself didn't answer any burning questions I had after rereading the article, it did prompt me to think more about Deresiewicz's claims. So I set out examining some of the major ideas he presents in his (in)famous article.

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The first thing that I noticed about the article was it's title, "Don't Send Your Kid to the Ivy League." It's not "Don't go to an Ivy League." By suggesting that the parents are the audience of this article, it disempowers the student right from the beginning. Deresiewicz presents a reality in which educational excellence seems almost manufactured by the parents, rather than the student. I found this quote particularly potent.

"The more hurdles there are, the more expensive it is to catapult your kid across them. Wealthy families start buying their children’s way into elite colleges almost from the moment they are born: music lessons, sports equipment, foreign travel (“enrichment” programs, to use the all-too-perfect term)—most important, of course, private-school tuition or the costs of living in a place with top-tier public schools. The SAT is supposed to measure aptitude, but what it actually measures is parental income, which it tracks quite closely."

Indeed, the article presents numerous examples of how students are essentially herded like sheep to certain goals. Consider some of the following examples:

-"You chose the most prestigious place that let you in; up ahead were vaguely understood objectives: status, wealth—“success.” What it meant to actually get an education and why you might want one—all this was off the table. Everyone dressed as if they were ready to be interviewed at a moment’s notice."

-"Our system of elite education manufactures young people who are smart and talented and driven, yes, but also anxious, timid, and lost, with little intellectual curiosity and a stunted sense of purpose: trapped in a bubble of privilege, heading meekly in the same direction, great at what they’re doing but with no idea why they’re doing it." 

Now I'm making Deresiewicz look like a pessimist, and that's a little unfair. The majority of his book is constructive in nature (according to him). But still, these excerpts are rather powerful aren't they? But how true are they?

In the end, I think Deresiewicz is onto something. While he has received a lot of backlash from students and teachers alike, I would say that such is to be expected when such a extraordinary claim is made. To me, his ultimate claim is that our educational system is phony. And slowly, we're becoming phony too.

I think this idea is most prevalent in his view on the modern student's "social engagements." Deresiewicz feels that our experiences have become so commodified that even service has become nothing more than a resume builder. In short:

"Why is it that people feel the need to go to places like Guatemala to do their projects of rescue or documentation, instead of Milwaukee or Arkansas?"

I've asked this type of question myself pertaining to my own activities in college. And though it's tough to admit, I think any high achieving student knows the answer. In the system we have found ourselves in, it's difficult to just be authentic. We are bombarded with numerical metrics from a young age, and come to connote them with out worth. The media constantly uses phrases like the "value of an education" which always refer to monetary value or job security. Even amongst ourselves, we judge those whose resumes are not as long, or whose college is not as "prestigious." Through this all, the last thing we seem to do is really care about what we're learning.

I think this quote from the article is very telling.

"Once, a student at Pomona told me that she’d love to have a chance to think about the things she’s studying, only she doesn’t have the time. I asked her if she had ever considered not trying to get an A in every class. She looked at me as if I had made an indecent suggestion."

In the end, I agree with most of Deresiewicz's criticisms. But although they are prevalent forces in modern education, one must be careful to make any sort of blanket statement on students. As young people, we can change our perspectives and goals overnight with the right inspiration.

The loss of this ability is exactly what Deresiewicz seems to fear the most.
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In a future post, I'll share my opinion on how Brown relates to this "Ivy Syndrome."

On Videogames Part 1

"Videogames." What kind of connotations does this word carry? For a long time, I thought the answer was simple. Videogames are for nerds. They're for people who like to stay inside all day, and don't "have a life." In the eyes of parents, they facilitate mental deterioration. In short, videogames are at best a simple diversion, and at worst an addictive, useless waste of time.

This rather extreme perspective has lessened over time. Videogames have made remarkable headway in becoming a respected force in the entertainment industry. One could argue that this trend has largely empirical roots. As the gaming industry has aged, so too has its audience. The median age of a gamer is now 31 (Source). Gaming as an industry has become bigger than Hollywood and music. Popular games sell millions of copies in days.  

There are people studying the benefits of video games for learning and health. There are books acknowledging and analyzing the huge role video games have played in the shaping of our collective culture.

Thus the image of gaming has slowly evolved beyond its early condemnation. One might even think that such a view should be antiquated. 

Indeed, modern America has come to tolerate a lot of things. 

But it still doesn't tolerate video games.

Yes, I know that I'm making a pretty radical statement here. No, I don't have any studies to back this one up. But even though I'll be the first to attest that the plural of "anecdote" is not "data", this is one case in which I think an anecdote provides some apt insight to my case for those who are still dubious.

The following excerpt is taken from a young lawyer's post on a gaming site, Kotaku.

"On another occasion, I had a really cool co-worker and his girlfriend over for dinner with me and my wife. Sitting in the living room, waiting for the taco meat to finish simmering (yay tacos), he saw an Xbox 360 controller on the coffee table. His reaction?

"I didn't know you have kids," he said smiling, gesturing to the controller.

"I don't."

Buh-bye smile."

I've seen variants of this story play out in my own life and in others countless times. Despite gaming's huge audience and influence in modern culture, the social stigma attached to it remains just a watered down version of the view I presented in the first paragraph.

I realize my tone has become a bit hostile towards this perspective. That was not my intended purpose. Rather, I hope this post has organized and presented my understanding of gaming as it stands today, both in an economic and cultural sense. Indeed, I wouldn't necessarily say I even condemn this view.

But as for my full own opinions on these matters, perhaps that is best saved for another post.

10 Books

This was a facebook challenge from a friend.

My dorm room bookshelf

Rules: In your status, list 10 books that have stayed with you in some way. Don't take more than a few minutes and don't think too hard. They don't have to be the "right books" or great works of literature, just the ones that have affected you in some way.

1. Crime and Punishment (Fyodor Dostoevsky): This book made my Junior year summer. Dostoevsky is a master in all aspects, and I couldn't put it down. It also singlehandedly got me into Russian Literature. Speaking of Russian Lit...

2. Anna Karenina (Leo Tolstoy): Of all the tragedies I have read, Tolstoy's epic is unmatched in its complexity and sheer scope. Even after finishing it, one gets the feeling that he/she has only taken in half of all the book has to say!

3. Gregor the Overlander (Suzanne Collins): Before the Hunger Games, Collins wrote about a boy named Gregor. This was my favorite youth series, and I still look back fondly at my time exploring the "Underworld." A legendary series by all accounts.

4. Warriors: Into the Wild (Erin Hunter): Another nostalgic pick. Specifically, Hunter's world of cats and clans stimulated my thoughts pertaining to my own cat, Zebra. It's a good series in and of itself, but I think the way it related to my cat made it special for me. To this day, I like to imagine that Zebra is in Starclan.

5. Silence of the Lambs (Thomas Harris): There's just something about this psychological horror story... Harris paces the novel very well, and knows how to disgust and mortify you just enough to keep you reading to the relatively happy end. A compelling book that shocked me with its brutality, both in imagery and themes.

6. The Report Card (Andrew Clements): This book made me realize that I am powerful. Or, at least as powerful as a fifth grader could be. Nora's ability to revolutionize her school system was a powerful story to me. It's a story that highlights individual power to change outdated societal systems, packaged in a charming children's book. Now that I think about it, my dislike for standardized tests like the SAT might have started here.

7. Nectar in a Sieve (Kamala Markandaya): This was actually a book from World Civ. class that we never ended up discussing. It was only around 200 pages, and combined with Markandaya's beautiful and riveting writing, I remember plowing through it in a single day. Rukmani's story reminds us to be grateful for what we have, and it paints a disturbingly powerful image of what rural life in India can be like.

8. A Streetcar named Desire (Tennessee Williams): The only book/play that has ever made me come close to tears. Anna Karenina's style of tragedy is like a slow, dull pain. One can feel it creeping up and tugging at the heartstrings, but Tolstoy intertwines it with happy moments as well. Streetcar just punches you right from the start and never stops. It's an unrelenting story of the destruction of innocence and a grim reminder of the sacrifices involved in any cultural "revolution".

9. Notes from Underground (Fyodor Dostoevsky): Yeah, I couldn't help but put two Dostoevsky books on here. Out of all literary characters, "The Underground Man" is probably the character that has inspired my most ambivalent feelings. His tale is just so fascinating... Dostoevsky also has an excellent sense of dark humor in this short tale.

10. Book of Ecclesiastes (Bible): The first book that I ever deeply thought about.

On Libraries

13th floor of the Brown Sciences Library

When you really think about it, libraries are miracles. Within each of their countless volumes lies information yes, but also an author's livelihood.

Some books are written in just a year, while others may take a lifetime. The pictured shelf includes thesis' from 1980 up to 2008. For each volume, there was a Brown student who spent eight years studying and writing deep into the night to produce it.

Did they do it for recognition in the academic circles? Perhaps it was just for a degree or monetary success? Though my cynical side tries to manifest itself, the reality of what towers before me leaves me speechless and in awe.

The end result of all their work is that I can simple walk on in and open a book. For a university student, such an act is like breathing, or drinking water. But that doesn't change the fact that the ability to do this is miraculous. Through the years these thesis' have been moved around, reprinted in newer bindings, borrowed, and returned. This was all so I can take those eight years of study in a physical form, and (attempt to) learn it more quickly.

Above all, what strikes me most about this room is the sense of legacy I feel. These students all walked the same halls and studied in the same libraries as I do now. Here before me stands an academic ancestry. It's now my generation's time to carry on this human thirst for knowledge. We may be spread across many different universities, departments, and homes, but in this curiosity we are united.

Arrogance and Judgement

"Am I arrogant?" This is a question that I've found myself pondering a lot lately. Specifically, I have been concerned that I judge people too quickly, despite my deeply held conviction that we are rarely what we appear on the outside. I guess that it's only natural that as one grows in knowledge, he/she becomes more inclined to make predictions with that knowledge. Nevertheless, it's a precarious action isn't it?

In the first few days of college, one tends to meet people. I mean a lot of people. The questions: "What's your major?" tends to fly around a lot. I have always held a disdain for questions with any kind of value judgement hidden within them, whether it is purposeful or not.

I wouldn't say these types of question irk me because of the possibility of irrationality they present, but more because of a sort of weird PTSD I have with forms of verbal judgement. Though I remember little from my early childhood, one prevailing sensation I have is of Asian adult's eyes looking at me. They scanned me with their words, and boxed me in based on my grades.

And yet I engage in such "sizing up" myself. And though I'd like to just say that the action itself is still wrong regardless of my hypocrisy, it's ridiculous to suggest that such an action is inherently immoral. "Isn't a little judgement necessary?" This is yet another question that has been torturing me as of late.

I'm suddenly reminded of Matthew 7: 1-2.

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2 For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."

There's a lot of verses like this in the Bible that present seemingly obvious truths that take on a more powerful scope when one is experiencing the issue itself. I've struggled a lot with my thoughts, but the truth has suddenly become evident to me. Currently, I lack the strength to apply this simple verse in my life.

For once, I wrote this post without any coherent idea of where I want to go, and as a result it seems I've hit a dead end. But there's something to be said about the power of spontaneous writing. There's a vigor and youth to it that I want to preserve, no matter how much writing I do in the future.

In the end, this post originated from some thoughts in real life and a rereading of One Iris as it stands today. I've noticed that One Iris has start to become a sort of sink for me to play God and "bestow" my "wisdom" on my readers. That's not what I intended, and indeed such a structure is reeking of arrogance. The counter part of arrogance is humility, so starting now I hope to exercise it a bit better.