Before I begin this reflection, I'd like to reiterate on some thoughts from my first semester reflections. My thoughts during this semester in particular have much to do with my own personal circumstances and perspectives on college life, and as such I don't think they reflect any grander truth about Sophomore year or college in general.
With that being said, "Sophomore Slump" is a well known phenomenon is it not? With the novelty of freshman year fully worn off, Sophomores must confront arguably the toughest questions of their young lives as immediate concerns, especially for those colleges and universities which have major or concentration declarations during this year. Though I may view my reflections as intensely personal, my sense is that my fellow students would voice similar concerns. Of course, I cannot say I have confirmed for myself whether this is true, though I have tried. Perhaps this disclaimer is more indicative of an unhealthy solitude than anything...
I noticed that my writings this semester adopted a graver tone than usual. As I look back on the semester from the comfort of vacation time, I realize how challenging this third semester of college has been to me on many fronts. Sure, the coursework itself was more difficult and I had a longer list of goals I wanted to work towards. But I think what really caused me to struggle this past semester was my own ideological questioning on the purpose of college, my studies, relationships, and life in general.
Such questions surely cross the minds of all young people at some point or another. Perhaps Sophomore year is just when the abstract questions start to fuse with reality. One begins to see more clearly where he/she is going given his/her current beliefs and lifestyle. At this same time, one's friends and family often enter a period of transition as well. Old friends will take diverging paths, or perhaps grow more distant. The student's family is faced with the burden of financing his/her education. While the student is beginning to face the realities of the "real world", perhaps the parents are also faced with contemplations about the meaning of the latter half of their lives. Retirement, dreams, fulfillment, mortality... It's a big bag of deep and volatile topics, perhaps prone to mood swings much in the same way as their sons and daughters are.
And in all of this, the student's empathy has grown. He/she sees the family changing, friends evolving, and society advancing in its ever confounding way. What does he/she make of all of it?
...
Perhaps it is best simply to not make anything at all. I have lately been trying to adopt a philosophy which simply ignores these big questions, at least for now. Perhaps the young mind simply was not meant to ponder such things.
For now, it is probably best to simply live life and absorb as much of it as you can, without reflecting too deeply on it. I'm reminded of an essay by Marina Keegan published in the Yale Daily News. Titled, "The Opposite of Loneliness", it espouses a deeply heartening, yet simple view of college life in spite of all its uncertainties. In particular, I was struck by this quote from the young author:
"We’re so young. We’re so young. We’re twenty-two years old. We have so much time. There’s this sentiment I sometimes sense, creeping in our collective conscious as we lay alone after a party, or pack up our books when we give in and go out – that it is somehow too late. That others are somehow ahead. More accomplished, more specialized. More on the path to somehow saving the world, somehow creating or inventing or improving. That it’s too late now to BEGIN a beginning and we must settle for continuance, for commencement."
Yes, this third semester has been a bit of a stumble for me in some ways. But I need to do my best to keep my life in perspective, and not attach such finality to my actions or the paths I take. Hopefully next semester I'll try more to absorb college life for what it is, rather than seeing its faults and rejecting it for what I think it should be.
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